Your Joy is Invalid
Alright… let’s start with the origins of this series of blogs—because it starts in a strange place.
There are two types of people in this world:
Those who love decorating for Christmas before Thanksgiving.
Those who hate it when people decorate before Thanksgiving.
Every year, right around October 1st, the grumblings begin—at the sliding doors of Lowe’s, with the tinkling bells of Hobby Lobby, and through commercials while you’re just trying to relax at home. Christmas decorations are here... and they’re here to stay.
For most of my life, I was one of those grumblers. If the scent of pine needles, cinnamon, or gingerbread hit my nostrils before Thanksgiving, my eye would start to twitch a little. But all that changed on a Zoom call.
This was during the pandemic when most of our interactions happened over Zoom. On one call, I noticed that one of the guys had a Christmas tree up in the background... in September. Not even the Whos down in Whoville decorate that early.
Someone finally asked about it. He shrugged and said:
"There’s so little joy right now in the world—we figured we’d bring some joy into our home. It makes us happy."
Hold up. So people put up Christmas decorations not just to annoy the rest of us Scrooge McDucks? It’s not about us?
This got me thinking: If something brings someone joy, why attack it? Do we think someone else’s joy is invalid just because we don’t understand or agree with it?
Are We Invalidating Others' Joy?
This question goes beyond Christmas decorations. I started to wonder—how often do we side-eye someone else's joy just because it doesn't make sense to us? What if, instead of rolling our eyes or getting grumpy about it, we took a second to understand why it makes them happy?
Let’s be real: I’ve definitely judged people for finding joy in things I don’t get. But honestly—does it really hurt me if someone is stringing up Christmas lights in September or sipping pumpkin spice in August? If it brings them joy, why am I so quick to invalidate it?
And here's the kicker: am I letting other people do the same thing to me? Am I letting their opinions snuff out the things that bring me joy, just because they don’t get it?
This is something we really need to think about as followers of Jesus. We’re called to experience a joy that doesn’t always fit the world's standards. But do we even know what that joy is for us? And are we protecting it from the pressures around us?
Let’s get into it…
What Is Joy?
Generally speaking, what do people believe brings joy?
Comfort?
Ease?
Possessions?
Admiration?
Accomplishments?
Getting your way?
Getting that final punch on your Subway card for a free sandwich?
In each of these examples, joy is tied to circumstances. But as followers of Jesus, we’re offered joy that goes beyond our circumstances.
Joy in God’s Presence
Scripture ties joy to our experiences, but not in the way we expect:
Psalm 16:11
You make known to me the path of life;
you will fill me with joy in your presence,
with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
We’ve gotta catch this—joy comes from being in God’s presence. As believers, we have the Holy Spirit living within us. That means, no matter where we are or what’s happening around us, God’s presence is with us. And honestly, that’s a game-changer.
But let’s get real—where do I actually feel God’s presence in my life? I’m not talking about some floating-on-a-cloud moment. I mean those everyday spaces where I think, "Oh, there You are, God." For me, it's usually when I'm outside.
Maybe for you, it’s in a different space—your favorite chair at home, in a worship service, while you’re praying or in community with others. Wherever it is, we all have these physical or emotional spaces where God shows up. The question is: are we looking for Him?
In my experience, He shows up when we seek Him.
Wherever or however it happens, joy comes when we intentionally seek God’s presence. And I’ve found that the more I do that, the more I see Him—everywhere.
God shows up when and where we seek Him.
Let me show you a cool example from Scripture…
Jesus: Exactly Where He’s Supposed to Be
If you have a moment today, go and check out Luke 2 and pay attention to this pattern.
When people go looking for Jesus, they find Him exactly where He is supposed to be.
After His birth, angels go to shepherds taking care of their sheep and tell them where to find Jesus. They go and they find Him exactly where He was supposed to be.
Simeon, a man who had waited for the Savior his whole life, is led by the Spirit to the Temple, and he finds Jesus, exactly where He was supposed to be.
Wise men come from afar, following a star. When they reach their destination, they find Jesus, exactly where He was supposed to be.
When Jesus is 12 years old, He is accidentally left in Jerusalem by His family. When they go back for Him, they find Him in the Temple—and He says to them:
"Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?"
Basically, "I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be."
When people were looking for Jesus, they found Him exactly where He was supposed to be. So here’s the question: Do you want the joy that comes from being in God’s presence? I believe that if we seek Him, we’ll find Him—exactly where He’s supposed to be.
The World’s Definition of Joy vs. God’s
The apostle Paul wrote a massive part of the Christian Scriptures. We have a ton of letters where he helps people figure out what it looks like to follow Jesus. In one of his letters, he spells out and contrasts worldly joy and true joy:
Galatians 5:19-21a
When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these.
You may be thinking to yourself: Whoah Sherri! No one thinks any of these things are Joy!
But let’s think this through together-
Sexual immorality & lust: Chasing pleasure to feel happy.
Hostility & division: The satisfaction of getting the upper hand.
Selfish ambition: Believing that success will bring lasting happiness.
We won’t break down each one of these, but the point is clear.
The world promises joy through all kinds of things—
But is any of this truly joy?
True Joy from the Spirit
A few verses later, Paul shows us where real joy comes from:
Galatians 5:22-23
But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!
Joy isn’t something we manufacture—it’s a fruit of the Spirit. It flows from the Spirit living within us, independent of external circumstances.
This should be both a relief and a challenge for each of us. We are all hard-wired to seek out what makes us happy, whether it’s temporary or long-lasting.
The relief comes in this: we don’t have to do the work of manufacturing and perfecting joy in our lives—the Spirit will do it for us.
The challenge comes in this: we actually do have to do the work of seeking and allowing the Spirit to change our hearts and minds.
Guarding Our Joy Against the Pressures of the World
Here’s the thing: joy doesn’t just float around, waiting for us to grab it and hold on tight. We have to actively guard it—because the world will do its best to steal it.
You know those moments when you’re feeling good, like you’ve just had a great time with God, and then something happens—an annoying email, a judgmental comment on social media, a bad day at work—and bam, joy’s gone. It’s like the world is constantly throwing curveballs at our peace, trying to snatch the joy right out of our hands.
So, how do we guard it? Here are a few things I’ve learned (the hard way, of course):
Get Clear on What Brings You Joy in God’s Presence
First off, you have to know what actually brings you joy in God’s presence. Like we talked about earlier, joy isn’t based on fleeting things. It’s rooted in knowing that God is with us. So when the world starts throwing distractions at you, go back to the basics. What are the simple things that help you experience God’s presence?Set Boundaries—Yes, Even with Good Things
Sometimes we forget that guarding joy means setting boundaries. We live in a world that thrives on distractions and comparison. It’s easy to scroll through social media and feel like everyone else has it together, and suddenly, your joy feels like it’s slipping. That’s when you need to step back and say, “Nope, not today.” It’s okay to turn off the noise, whether that’s social media, toxic conversations, or even well-meaning people who just drain you. Guard your joy by protecting your mental and emotional space.Choose Your Focus—Daily
I’ll be honest, there are days when I wake up and I don’t feel like choosing joy. But here’s what I’ve learned: guarding joy is about where you choose to focus. The world will always offer plenty of reasons to feel frustrated, disappointed, or worried. But if we choose to focus on God’s goodness—His presence in the everyday stuff—we start to see the joy that’s already there.Find Community That Protects Your Joy
We weren’t meant to do life alone. There’s power in having a community that helps you protect it. Surround yourself with people who remind you where true joy comes from. This could be a small group, a close friend, or even an online community. These are the people who speak life into you when the world tries to tear you down. And in return, you get to do the same for them. Protecting joy isn’t a solo mission—it’s a team effort.Pray for Joy
I know, this sounds like a given, but I can’t tell you how many times I’ve forgotten to simply ask for joy. When you feel your joy slipping, ask God to fill you with His joy again. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit, remember? We don’t have to create it on our own—God gives it freely. But we do have to seek it and stay connected to Him through prayer. It’s like hitting the “refresh” button on your heart when everything feels heavy.
A Challenge for This Week
As we wrap up, I want to challenge you. The challenge may sound like work—it is—but truth is just knowledge until we put it into practice.
So here’s the challenge: Take some time this week to reflect on what currently brings you joy. Is your happiness tied to things the world values, or is it rooted in God’s presence?
It’s fine to enjoy life’s small joys—celebrate your free sandwich! Take in the joy that comes from community and happy circumstances. But also consider where your joy is truly rooted.
Seek joy in God’s presence this week. I have a feeling that if you look, you’ll find Him exactly where He’s supposed to be—ready to meet you there.
Thanks for reading!
Share the Joy!
If this was significant for you, share it with someone who needs to hear this today.
Next week, we’re going to talk about the fullness of joy that can come from community, and I’m so excited to share it with you!
